Dear Abbey

Dear Abbey,
I recently bought an old Yamaha TX650 and spent a ton of time and money on it to make it look badass. Problem is that my girlfriend says I look like a chimpanzee hanging from a tree branch, humping a football.
Perplexed in Peoria

Dear Perplexed,
if your girlfriend cannot love you as you are she is not the girl for you at all.
Seek out one who loves chimpanzees and wants to be your football.
And although football humping is best done in privacy, our readers would love to see a photo of your tree.
 
Perplexed, Perplexed, you have no complaint,
You is what you is and you ain't what you ain't,
So listen up buster, ....
how's the rest go?

Hi xjwmx,
the next partial and full line could be:-
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - , and gird up your cluster,
she's a vertical twin so there's two ways to thrust her.
 
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