HAPPY NEW YEAR

MrBultaco

MrBultaco

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It's almost 2019, I'm tired and wore out, and I still have so many unanswered questions!!!! I haven’t found out who let the dogs out...where’s the beef...how to get to Sesame Street... why Dora doesn’t just use Google Maps...Why do all flavors of fruit loops taste exactly the same, or how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop......why eggs are packaged in a flimsy carton, but batteries are secured in plastic that’s tough as nails...what does the fox say... why “abbreviated” is such a long word; or why is there a D in ‘fridge’ but not in refrigerator... why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor yet dish-washing liquid is made with real lemons... why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections... and, why do you have to “put your two cents in” but it’s only a “penny for your thoughts” where’s that extra penny going to... why does The Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same tune... why did you just try to sing those two previous songs... and just what exactly is Victoria’s secret? and where is Waldo?... Can you hear me now?...and do you really think I am this witty?? ... I actually got this from a friend, who stole it from her brother’s girlfriend’s, uncle’s cousin’s who lived next door to an old class mate’s mailman.
Have a nice morning, afternoon or evening.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
 
MrBultaco said:
It's almost 2019, I'm tired and wore out, and I still have so many unanswered questions!!!! I haven’t found out who let the dogs out...where’s the beef...how to get to Sesame Street... why Dora doesn’t just use Google Maps...Why do all flavors of fruit loops taste exactly the same, or how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop......why eggs are packaged in a flimsy carton, but batteries are secured in plastic that’s tough as nails...what does the fox say... why “abbreviated” is such a long word; or why is there a D in ‘fridge’ but not in refrigerator... why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor yet dish-washing liquid is made with real lemons... why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections... and, why do you have to “put your two cents in” but it’s only a “penny for your thoughts” where’s that extra penny going to... why does The Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same tune... why did you just try to sing those two previous songs... and just what exactly is Victoria’s secret? and where is Waldo?... Can you hear me now?...and do you really think I am this witty?? ... I actually got this from a friend, who stole it from her brother’s girlfriend’s, uncle’s cousin’s who lived next door to an old class mate’s mailman.
Have a nice morning, afternoon or evening.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
Click to expand...

Hi MrBultaco,
the answers to those questions and to many more can be found pressed into clay tablets dug up at middle eastern archaeological sites.
If you can read cuniform and speak Sumarian.
And why is New Year celebrated on Jan 1st (or Jan 6th or whenever the Chinese do it) instead of on the winter solstice Dec 22nd?
But WTF? A happy and prosperous New Year to you too.
 
Hey Fred,
I tried to learn Sumarian, but decided I should learn English 1st.:thumbsup:
 
I wanted to send some sort of holiday greeting to my friends and colleagues, but it is difficult in today's world to know exactly what to say without offending someone.


So I met with my lawyer yesterday, and on her advice I wish to say the following: Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral celebration of the summer solstice holiday practiced with the most enjoyable traditions of religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for the religious / secular persuasions and / or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.


I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2019, but not without due respect for the calendar of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make our country great (not to imply that Australia is necessarily greater than any other country) and without regard to the race, creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishes.


By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms: This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her / him or others and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher.

The wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.


E&OE


Best Regards (without prejudice)


Name withheld (Privacy Act)
 
sounds like the beginning of the making of a congress-person
 
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