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justa joke

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by weekendrider, Jan 10, 2010.

  1. MaxPete

    MaxPete Life with Lucille...I suggest, she decides. Top Contributor XS650.com Supporter

  2. Downeaster

    Downeaster Everything in XS Top Contributor

    Alrighty then, if THAT'S how this thread is gonna go:

    Little Jack Horner
    Sat in a corner
    Eating his sister Mary.

    Stuck in his thumb,
    pulled out a plum and said
    Where the heck is your cherry?
     
  3. gggGary

    gggGary Stop that! Top Contributor XS650.com Supporter

  4. Jim

    Jim I have a plan. It's something to deviate from. Top Contributor XS650.com Supporter

  5. geedubya

    geedubya geedubya Top Contributor XS650.com Supporter

  6. geedubya

    geedubya geedubya Top Contributor XS650.com Supporter

  7. kshansen

    kshansen XS650 Junkie Top Contributor

    725
    2,030
    243
    Another one I just had to post:

    "You can't fix stupid, but duct tape will muffle the sound"
     
    Jim, Mailman, Greyandridin and 3 others like this.
  8. Greyandridin

    Greyandridin Got nothing to do and all day to do it XS650.com Supporter

    I miss a couple of days and the place goes to ?? GETS BETTER
     
    Jim likes this.
  9. Greyandridin

    Greyandridin Got nothing to do and all day to do it XS650.com Supporter

    I was trying to remember how that one went
    I'm good for another 50-60 years now
     
    Jim and TwoManyXS1Bs like this.
  10. Downeaster

    Downeaster Everything in XS Top Contributor

    [​IMG]

    Ima just leave this here. There are enough of us old farts that will get it.

    Thought about sending it to my daughter but not sure she'd make the connection.
     
    Paul Sutton, gggGary, Jim and 6 others like this.
  11. Greyandridin

    Greyandridin Got nothing to do and all day to do it XS650.com Supporter

    I seem to recall a joke that ended with "and the old lady too" (same yodel)
     
    gggGary and Jim like this.
  12. 59Tebo

    59Tebo 59Tebo Top Contributor

    [​IMG]

    S.B.O.M.N.!!! (Snorted Beer Out My Nose!)
    Darth Vader's last name was Ginsberg! :laughing:
     
  13. MaxPete

    MaxPete Life with Lucille...I suggest, she decides. Top Contributor XS650.com Supporter

  14. geedubya

    geedubya geedubya Top Contributor XS650.com Supporter

    A thief entered a house mid-afternoon ;

    He tied up the woman and at knife-point asked the man to hand over the jewelry and money.

    The man started sobbing and said, "You can take anything you want. You can kill me also. But please untie the rope and free her."

    Thief: "You must really love your wife!"

    Man: "No, but she’ll be home shortly".
     
    JCE, kshansen, Greyandridin and 8 others like this.
  15. MaxPete

    MaxPete Life with Lucille...I suggest, she decides. Top Contributor XS650.com Supporter

  16. Signal

    Signal XS650 Junkie Top Contributor

  17. Downeaster

    Downeaster Everything in XS Top Contributor

    Pete, we are now even for all the times I made you snort! ROFLMAOWTIME!
     
  18. thuban

    thuban Horse Scratcher

    It's getting close to BnS time! That's Bait n Shoot, for the Bamby hunters. I'll have to introduce ya'll to Slim one of these days soon.
    Anyhow, We was down at Wal-mart looking at the fishing tackle. Wal-mart will hire anybody! They hired a blind man to work in the fishing tackle department. There was this woman and she was looking for her husband a fishing pole for his birthday or something and she was being really picky. Not this one, nope not that one...So finally she finds one and takes it over to the counter. She said "how much is this one?" The guy said " I don't know I'm blind, but if you drop it on the floor, I can tell you." She dropped it on the floor and he said "That's ten bucks. She bent over to pick it up and cut a big ole fart. Everybody heard it, but she wanted the pole so she took it up to the counter. The guy said "That will Twenty bucks!" She said "But you said it was ten dollars!" He said "It's ten bucks for the pole and another ten bucks for the stink bait and the duck call!"

    Slim said his neighbor came over the other day. Slim said, "What's up bud?" Neighbor said, "Slim, my dish washer quit working!" Slim said, "Well slap her on the A$$ and tell her she looks good in an apron!"

    Next day neighbor comes over and said, "Slim, my girl friend started smoking!" Slim said, "Well maybe you ought to slow down and think about using a lubricant?" Neighbor said, "NO! Cigarettes!" "Oh!".

    Slim said, "Heh, bud, it ought to be against the law for blind people to sky dive!" His buddy said "Why?" Slim said, "Cause it scares the sh*t outa the dog!"

    My Buddy said, "Slim, why don't witches wear panties when flying on their broom sticks?" I said, uhhh, better traction?" ( Getting close to Halloween so...)

    My girl friend said "Slim, how come your damn ole hound dog is always licking his pecker?" I said, "Probably cause he can't make a fist!"

    They say ya can't put a square peg in a round hole, but have you looked at a horse turd real close lately?"

    My buddy said, "Slim, How do you know if a saloon girl really has the hots for ya?" I said, "Well, you just kinda run your hand down her paints and see if it feels like your feeding a horse!"

    I mean, really, you guys have got to man up on these jokes!
    Slim
     
  19. Jim

    Jim I have a plan. It's something to deviate from. Top Contributor XS650.com Supporter


    6BB535C1-BF1A-4F0F-AB30-DD5AFEE9B8C8.jpeg

    Sorry Slim... Pete... couldn't help myself.... :laughing:
     
    thuban and Greyandridin like this.

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