Lecturing relative getting on my last nerve

Mailman

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Anyone who has been riding motorcycles for any length of time has run into somebody like this.
Last weekend I attended a little family birthday gathering for my mothers birthday. There is a distant inlaw of mine, who's orbit only intersects mine once every few years, who pulls this same routine every time I see him. I even told my wife before we got there that he would do this.
While sitting at a table in a restaurant with my family around me , he poses the question.
" Bob, you still got your motorcycle?" ( He damn well knows I do. ) I hold up two fingers and say "Two of them." No smile on my face because I know what's coming. Then he says " Oh...hmmm, I see."
He then try's his best to look sad and gives me the disappointed head shake.
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He then reels off a couple stories of someone ( he knew personally of course! ) that got killed or maimed while riding a motorcycle. This guy is a retired airline captain and the family just thinks he's the smartest most wonderful guy. And I always bite my toungue and just let it pass, not wishing to cause an argument or make a scene. I have tried to explain that I am a careful rider and wear protective gear, but it doesn't deter him. He then turns his attention to my wife and says "Do you ride with him?" She says yes. And a new round of disappointed head shaking begins.
I told my wife afterword that I'm always tempted to ask him if he has heard about the thousands of people that have plunged to a fiery death aboard commercial airlines jets?
But I'm REALLY trying to be the better person. :mad:
 
OMG, Bob, I've got so many of these folks like your distant in-law in my life (I do try to avoid them). They are often nurses, prepared with endless stories of broken limbs.
I have learned to simply smile broadly, as I know that I am probably having more fun than they are.
And if they they press the point, I say, I believe it was Charles Lindbergh who said, "I don't believe in taking unnecessary risks, but a life without risk is a life not worth living."
Followed by, "If I die on my bike, I will have one hell of a smile on my face."

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Those are good ones.
I will keep them handy in my back pocket in case one of these numbskulls like your in-law needs further convincing.:laugh2:
However, some of them will never be convinced that what we do constitutes a great, thrilling life.
But we know better, don't we? :cheers:
That's all that counts.
 
“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaimiming “”Wow! What a ride!””

— Hunter S. Thompson
 
“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaimiming “”Wow! What a ride!””

— Hunter S. Thompson
Such a excellent quote from one of our greatest Gonzo journalists !
 
He then reels off a couple stories of someone ( he knew personally of course! ) that got killed or maimed while riding a motorcycle.
Point a gun at him and tell him about people who got their head blown off. You can say anything if you're smiling...
 
Karma demands that a meteor smite him one morning when he's out picking up his paper. "Shoulda' stayed inside where it's safe" you can say...
Nah, just kiddin. Some people will never get it Bob. Life's too short to fret over them. Just enjoy the ride...
Jim.
 
Yeah, I hate it when people start in like that - so presumptuous. I understand not wanting to cause a scene, but at some point, your right to enjoy the meal trumps (ooops - is that politics???) his right to open his cake-hole and lecture you about your hobby.

How about listening for a couple of minutes and saying (perhaps a trifle louder than normal) something like: Gee, thanks for the warning Mom!” to him.

....or perhaps you could solemnly intone, “Well, we will all die someday of something Chuck - at least nobody will think I’m a boring, gutless old f@rt who nags people at family dinners.”

....how about simply showing him this.....

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Mailman, Your wife said "yes" she rides with you ! Thats the win ! Riding is about the unique enjoyment, not how sensible it is or isn't. So many people even just like to see motorcycles , people of all kinds. Children wave, Other men start conversations, Women look and smile .. You are a motorcyclist, a gift many can only wish for !
 
Right on TM! I was filling up Lucille last evening and a chap made a point of stopping his car, getting out and coming over to admire her (and her patina).
 
You can't scare me, I've had cancer. And what is life, without death to give it a sense of urgency? I heard once "...the past is history, the future's a mystery, but today is a gift from God. That's why it's called the present."
 
There is something about me that keeps folks from pulling that type of thing and the few that didn't get the drift, paid for their lack of judgement.:mad::(:rolleyes: But I would get this guy alone or even write a letter! and calmly tell him to stop with the lectures cause you is all growed up now and capable of assessing your risks. You might make mention that like piloting, motorcycle riding risk is strongly influenced by operator habits.
May I add that few fates are crueler than living long enough to have your brain rot. Dealing with relative #2 and #3 right now and have little illusion about my own fate if my wayward ways don't intervene first. :rock:
 
I have used "hey, you know, motorcycle riding is a very engaging passion of mine, you have any passions, my friend". Thus, turning the conversation back at the other party.
 
I have used "hey, you know, motorcycle riding is a very engaging passion of mine, you have any passions, my friend". Thus, turning the conversation back at the other party.

My response would've been:

"Yeah, I get that a lot from over-protective parents"...

Fundamentally It's about dominance; turning it back on him one way or another and getting on top in the wrestling match. Anything that will do that would work. Many things would do that. Getting an inch from his face and acting gay would do it. Genuinely ignoring him would do it too.
 
Hate to be quoting a Harley advertisement here on a Yamaha XS650 forum but...
"If i have to explain, You wouldn't understand!"

I was one of the lucky ones when I was a teenager and all the kids parents were telling their kids how dangerous motorcycles were and demanding they not ride them. See dad had spent the first part of his WWII army service doing motorcycle escort duty for convoys in the southern states before heading to Europe and half-tracks. And mom had spent her teen years riding on the back of her older brothers Indian while he was bar hopping around town, with out her mom's approval.

So me and my older brother were almost "forced" to get motorcycles, little ones at first, 60cc, imports. One regret I and also my mom expressed after dad's passing was that dad never got back to motorcycles, guess he was too committed to providing for his family. He did once in awhile sneak a ride around the quarry, where we both worked, on some of the bikes I rode so he still got a little fix in his latter years.
 
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