Stupid things to do on a motorcycle !

..... 1971.... my first "real" m/cycle.. 1968 Cl350 Honda. Unlike the Bonanza mini bikes, scooters, mopeds and Vespa I had ..this was a real motorcycle. It had levers... gears... a manly bike.... It introduced me to many adventures. The very first one begun minutes after take'n ownership. Fired the bike up in the parking lot and just caught 2nd gear when.. ooh... the dreaded parking lot cable... took me right off the bike..which kept go'n. Shortly thereafter I discovered the price of turn signals, levers, brake pedal... :)
 
Mr. HD was NOT pleased to watch me stand his bike up, fold the side stand and duck-walk it off the street.

I did not look at him in a smug fashion while sitting on his bike, nor did I covertly flip him the bird when the cop wasn’t looking.

I promise.
Click to expand...

Of course you didn't, being the gentleman you are.

Snerk....
 
One time I was in the mood to male a side car..... never had one didn't know anything about them so I decided it was time and My Mom wanted one on her 250cc twin Suzuki..... so I hacked the frame of a 125cc street bike apart and cut the rear suspension of it lined it up about 1 foot in front ot the back wheel on the Suzuki.... ( it's axel bolt that is) so the wheel sat at almost perfectly the half way point between the 2 tires of the suzy..... scabbed together a frame from 3/4" water pipe.... and put a big metal box in it..... I rode it to town and I was not impressed
it was harder to steer than a sherman tank and even with the box empty and bolted down the right wheel would fly fairly easy....
I didn't see any shakes or shimmies so I declaired it safe for mom to ride..... she rode it to C.V. where my Highschool was at the time bought a pack of smokes and turned around and came back home she gets home and says Well it works but I can't steer the thing !
that was the one and only time she ever rode it ! ( Probably a Really GOOD THING TOO !!!!! ) later I cut it off the suzuki 250cc and told here Hay Mom your bike is rideable again ! ..... she comes out with her boots and jacket and helmit on and takes off..... I followed her a long way away that time.... she did a top speed of 45mph I doubt she ever got out of 3rd she pulled into the store and I pulled in behind her , she saw it was me
and said Oh HI Son ! at the time I had hard plastic sadle bags on my 305cc honda Dream , and sense Mom and I were at the ranch by ourselves
I said hay why not do your shopping now? I can put it in my saddle bags ! she said OH OK...... an hour and a half later and almost a fill basket later er headded to the bikes and she said OH no I forgot we were on the bikes !
I said no problem mom I doubble sacked everything ..... it was a tussel and a knock down dragout...but I actually got everything in the caddle bags except the bags ! and one light beg of bread and things .....
so we head back he bike won't start...... i put it on reserve and it fires right up..... I tell her get gas and I'll head on home .....
I fight the bread between my legs all the way home it does not want to stay in the bag........ I caught it 3/4 out of the bag 3 times
I arrived home and park by the door and start unloading about then I hear mom coming and it's running like shit !
she parks with a fatigued look on her face and says I MADE IT ! I was beginning to wonder.....
I looked at her fuel petcock and it was half away between on and reserve...... i put it straight down turn the key on and Kick it and it Springs to life.... she says OK smarty pants what did you do ? so I showed her again for the 50th time this is the fuel petcock ti controls gas to your carburetors it has to be straight down or straight side ways sideways to the front is reserved side ways to the back is off
and she acted like I just told that to here for the first time...... But You know give Mom a brake she's getting Old... in her 70's now and probably don't dig the mechanical things like I do .......
we unloaded my bike and got everything in the house...... mom made a pot of coffee and I moved my bike to it's usual hiding spot.
she hollers at me and said you can move mine too son ! I said OOOOOH NO you don't ...I will guide you..... for the next hour was an introduction to motorcycle basics all over again .... I said on I want to see if you can start that bike now..... Grumble and fuss but she went out there turned on the gas kicked it over and it didn't start I hollered through the screen door no throttle till it fires !
Vrooooom ! I went out there and moved the bike for her after she started it ! LOL
.....
there are so many STUPID things done on motorcycles in this post I'm not going to try and list them for ya
but the Worst was Assuming an older person has the capabilities (mentally or physical capabilities, i.e. Balance ) is the WORST
things change fast after 60 years what you may have been able to do and enjoy 3 months ago you may no longer be able to do !
Life in old age is not Kind ! in the end a Car crash was her demise drove straight into a guardrail on a sharp turn
extreme head trauma and she was having alot of trouble breathing.... worst case of enfisema any one there had ever seen nothing they could do.......then she caught pneumonia a week of that and she finally had rest.....
....
Bob.........
 
One time I was in the mood to make a side car..... never had one didn't know anything about them so I decided it was time and My Mom wanted one on her 250cc twin Suzuki..... so I hacked the frame of a 125cc street bike apart and cut the rear suspension of it lined it up about 1 foot in front ot the back wheel on the Suzuki.... ( it's axel bolt that is) so the wheel sat at almost perfectly the half way point between the 2 tires of the suzy..... scabbed together a frame from 3/4" water pipe.... and put a big metal box in it..... I rode it to town and I was not impressed
it was harder to steer than a sherman tank and even with the box empty and bolted down the right wheel would fly fairly easy....
I didn't see any shakes or shimmies so I declared it safe for mom to ride..... she rode it to C.V. where my Highschool was at the time bought a pack of smokes and turned around and came back home she gets home and says Well it works but I can't steer the thing !
that was the one and only time she ever rode it ! ( Probably a Really GOOD THING TOO !!!!! ) later I cut it off the suzuki 250cc and told here Hay Mom your bike is rideable again ! ..... she comes out with her boots and jacket and helmet on and takes off..... I followed her a long way away that time.... she did a top speed of 45mph I doubt she ever got out of 3rd she pulled into the store and I pulled in behind her , she saw it was me
and said Oh HI Son ! at the time I had hard plastic saddlebags on my 305cc honda Dream , and sense Mom and I were at the ranch by ourselves
I said hay why not do your shopping now? I can put it in my saddle bags ! she said OH OK...... an hour and a half later and almost a fill basket later er headed to the bikes and she said OH no I forgot we were on the bikes !
I said no problem mom I double sacked everything ..... it was a tussle and a knock down dragout...but I actually got everything in the saddle bags except the bags ! and one light beg of bread and things .....
so we head back but now the bike won't start...... i put it on reserve and it fires right up..... I tell her get gas and I'll head on home .....
I fight the bread between my legs all the way home it does not want to stay in the bag........ I caught it 3/4 out of the bag 3 times
I arrived home and park by the door and start unloading about then I hear mom coming and it's running like shit !
she parks with a fatigued look on her face and says I MADE IT ! I was beginning to wonder.....
I looked at her fuel petcock and it was half away between on and reserve...... i put it straight down turn the key on and Kick it and it Springs to life.... she says OK smarty pants what did you do ? so I showed her again for the 50th time this is the fuel petcock ti controls gas to your carburetors it has to be straight down or straight side ways sideways to the front is reserved side ways to the back is off
and she acted like I just told that to here for the first time...... But You know give Mom a brake she's getting Old... in her 70's now and probably don't dig the mechanical things like I do .......
we unloaded my bike and got everything in the house...... mom made a pot of coffee and I moved my bike to it's usual hiding spot.
she hollers at me and said you can move mine too son ! I said OOOOOH NO you don't ...I will guide you..... for the next hour was an introduction to motorcycle basics all over again .... I said on I want to see if you can start that bike now..... Grumble and fuss but she went out there turned on the gas kicked it over and it didn't start I hollered through the screen door no throttle till it fires !
Vrooooom ! I went out there and moved the bike for her after she started it ! LOL
.....
there are so many STUPID things done on motorcycles in this post I'm not going to try and list them for ya
but the Worst was Assuming an older person has the capabilities (mentally or physical capabilities, i.e. Balance ) is the WORST
things change fast after 60 years what you may have been able to do and enjoy 3 months ago you may no longer be able to do !
Life in old age is not Kind ! in the end a Car crash was her demise drove straight into a guardrail on a sharp turn
extreme head trauma and she was having alot of trouble breathing.... worst case of enfisema any one there had ever seen nothing they could do.......then she caught pneumonia a week of that and she finally had rest.....
....
Bob.........
 
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I stopped at DQ in Redding one time, their hamburgers were Raw and so were their fries as for the coke it was watered down so bad it was hardly drinkable..... anyway, I wasn't happy threw most of it in the trash and got back on the bike, fired it up and hung a left at the signal and the bike makes a huge lurch to the right that I was not expecting , it almost throws me off..... SIDESTAND ! I look down, well, it's up NOW... and rode off..... being distracted when getting on the bike ain't a good thing ....and though I loathe to admit it I've done that more than once !LOL
the worst was the Honda 1100cc when it touched it didn't fold but felt like you were hit from the left side by a Truck !
( yes it Had a Kill switch on the side stand that I removed ) so when I got the 82' XS650 I thought long and hard about removing it before I did........ it only took one time of the bike not starting because the sidestand was down to make up my mind !
I'ed guess to be all completely honest you could probably count how many times I took off with the side stand down on both hands and it would leave a few fingers I'm sure..... but I've put more miles on 2 wheels than I ever will in 4 wheel vehicles
the bad part about using 4 wheels is your butt gets soft and you can't sit in the saddle like ya used to
last long trip I had on a bike was only about 80 miles and my hands butt and bones were telling me GET OFF !!!!!!!
getting old Sux !
....LOL
Bob....
 
She sounds like a very unique soul, too. Like mother like son.
My stupidest stuff thankfully never got implemented. Way too much imagination. I remember being around 8 and thinking that an airplane I planned to make from some scrap 2x4s was going to fly. Around the same time I was going to build a servant robot out of parts from an electric-powered car I'd outgrown. But I was going to have to do all the work after my parents went to bed, because they'd object. I won't get into not too dissimilar things as an adult...
 
LOL Neither did I actually ! sorry for the typo ! I fixed it.....um and the bike ! I neutered it ! , it was drastic I know, but with the carbs off Mom couldn't ride ! LOL
at 115lbs soaking wet as she would say, ......the 250 was too much bike for her she needed a new 100cc 4 stroke bike and she would have been quite happy ! HAHAHAHA! if I would have had the money I would have bought it for her ! HA !
.... I ran over several Rattle snakes in my time ( i hate them with a passion) and a few times they hit the rear fender seams they curl up when crushed....I wonder why ? <EVIL GRIN> ..... oh watch doing that their kind'a slick on a heavier bike ! ...... they learned to stay off the road with me around ! HAHAHAHAHAHA !
..... I had one strike at me on our 2 mile driveway one time he missed and hit the exhaust pipe , I stopped and found some rocks and did him in too.....buried the head of course.... and cleaned my knife on the front tire so she would get the sent and find another !!!!!
...... after 20 years on that ranch we had finally eradicated all the rattle snakes but it took 20 years.... when I moved back to the ranch they had already started their assault again.... it certainly wasn't safe to have cattle there anymore ! there is a reason you Kill them ON sight !!!!
My wife is deathly afraid of them she says if she's ever bitten just call the morgue because she'll die of fright !
I've never been bitten by one but it's been very close several times , I figure I've killed at least 50 to 75 of them on the ranch alone in my life time
a Rattle snake is EVIL another snake like a gopher that is non poisonous can fill that niche perfectly ...too many critters loose their lives to the Rattlesnake.... if I could I'ed eradicate them ALL !
....Bob........
 
Was on a huntin' excursion with a friend out in east Kansas. Stepped on something squishy. Looked down, Copperhead! Jumped up and unholstered while still in the air. Seems that east Kansas has a problem with them. Fat stumpy things. Nearby swimmin' and fishin' hole is a favorite with his kids. Can't have this. Put down 3 that day...
 
mmmmmm... only couple of yrs ago bought a little honda 250 rd bike cheap but had to go a fair distance to pick it up , just as got home tired and knacked a mate and his missus turned up just in time to help unload it .. I was going to wait till the next day to try and start it but mate says lets do it now , easy job..HA.. wanted to start but just wouldn't... 3 hours later after trying every thing his missus says ..will it start with the sidestand down..:doh:... modern bike .. lifted sidestand and then 1 touch of the button ... modern bikes..AHHH..:gun:
 
love it Flea...........2 grown bikers spend 3 hours working on a problem and it takes a woman's logic to solve it......
 
Flea..... Been there done that !!!! LOL your not alone !!!!
....
A group of about 6 of us were riding our bikes through the small town of Central valley (now called Shasta lake city)
2 of the bikes were street leagle the rest were not.... we all had full tanks and were headded out to back bone road
a 4x4 only road that went from Jones valley all the way to burney..... a good 50 miles of dirt riding fun....
i'm leading in my street leagle bike and one of the guys in the back desides to pop a wheelie and ride on past me ....
here we're all trying to be quiet and do this incogneto..... and o'l dip stick decides to pull a stunt like that ....
he was on a 400 suzuki single with a tuned pipe and it was Super loud !
he dissipears over the hill infront of the rest of us.... and as I'm cresting the hill I see flashing lights of a CHP
I use my arm to signal a left turn at the crest and see the cop is peeling out going after our friend.....
we wait for trafic and I take everyone one block off the main drag and then turn right and wind up at the cut off that we were going to take anyway..... at the stop sign one of the guys ask where are we going ? I said around the CHP ! which was no where in sight by now so we head on out to jones valley and find o'l Dipstick waiting at the store , I had told them all that was where we were headded, and he said he knew where that was .... but I figured he would be spending the night in Jail.... he said well, I ended the wheelie at the top of the hill in time to see the CHP at the signal ..... I figured he saw me because the front of his car dipped like he hit his brakes.... so I slammed on the brakes and made a right hand turn and never looked back..... I said well where's your bike ? he said behind the store I didn't want him to drive by and see it !
...... I said You idiot ! we could all have been thrown in jail along with you..... he said yah but he would never have caught me !
i said well, he would have me I'm on a 90cc ! and they all thought that was funny !
this all happened because I met one of them at the gas station and he was asking about a good place to Ride and I told him Back-Bone Road
i tried to explain where it was but he was fairly new to the area and didn't know where anything was.... I said well heck I can show ya
my girlfriend was gone for the day and I had nothing to do so what the heck.... 4 suzuki 400cc with tuned pipes, and one yamaha MX360 that was tweaked out very well and a yamaha250 DT1 came up so I said do you know where jones valley store is and o'l dip stick says yah ! that's how I get to the lake ! so they all knew the general area.... we decided to get out of there asap and I led them up the street where it turned into back bone road..... and stopped at the sign and said Have fun boys ! and away they went
about a week later I went up there and those nuts were hill climbing a hill i could only crawl up !.....
a few of those guys has some serious screws loose in their heads ! the guy with the Yamaha 360 became a good friend and 2 of the others as well...... they found out I was fixing bikes and brought me theirs ! then their old beaters too !
but the point is....... when half your group has no licenses don't go drawing attention to yourself and pop a wheelie and ride it through the hart of town ! LOL....
....Bob.....
 
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LOL I'm trying to make my stories SHORT sense you guys have short attention spans but it ain't easy !
sorry for the long winded stories guys ! ..... that's short to me ! HA !
.....
Those same guys rode all over the jones valley campground and tore the hell out of the ground everywhere
now there is NO Motorcycles allowed off road anywhere at the lake..... if your riding along the shore line they can site you !
..... hell , now with the new found powers the game wardens have they can probably shoot ya !
when my buddies and I rode we went out backbone.... no body cared.... or perhaps the lake and stayed on the shore line
not tearing up the country side..... but not everyone does and because those few that didn't the rest of us suffer
.... I rode my 305 dream along the shore line one time took my fishing pole and parked on a point and did some fishing and took a good long dip in the cool water ...it was over 100 degrees that day...... as I'm packing up to leave a patrol boat pulls up and an older pot bellied guy gets out and walks up to me and says Your Robert arn't you ? I couldn't help but be suprised but said Yes I sure am ! who are you?
I can't remember his name right now, but he said His son had a skii-do that wouldn't start..... got it in the boat down there if you wann'a take a look... I said sure..... looking him over I knoticed his sheriff badge right off, and he was obviously on duty.....
it seams that his sons skii-do quit on him in the back of beyond and he went and rescued him..... his son was in the boat too....
we popped the engine cover and looked it over and I saw that the in line fuel filter had crap in it... i mentioned that it may well be plugged...
and the guy went to his big locker and pulled out about 6 more and said what size do ya need ? , he kept a bunch because that was a major reason most boats won't run..... believe it or not he actually had one that was the right size ! I swapped it out in a hart beat and hit the starter..... it took it a while and after slapping my hand over the carb it finally fired up the son was elated ! and jumping for joy
the sheriff and I were laughing so hard by the time we got it all buttoned up and back in the water we were both shaking our heads
he was about 12yrs old.....the kid hits the starter and it fires up and he's up skiing on that thing in a flash.....
I said Dam man that looks like allot of fun ! the sheriff said oh it is but the things that kid can do on that thing scares me to death !
I said I don't doubt it ! ..... he asked how much he owed me and I said for what ? heck I just lent a hand ! you don't owe me a thing.
we walked back to the bike and he told me of the recent new laws that you cannot ride your bike on the shore line anymore I was dumbfounded ! so he explained why.... he said some guys on Big yellow suzuki 2 strokes tore the hell out of the entire campground
we had chp sheriff and helicopters looking for them bastards but never did find any of them.....
I said Oh really ! well, I may know them..... I will tell them to steer clear of jones valley..... And the shore line ! he smiled and said you do that !
I told Opie, the guy on the Yamaha 360mx about it and he told them.....
I never saw them again.... last I hurd they were terrorizing the other side of town ! ..... driving over cars that were too slow and stuff like that....
...... I can't abide that kind of behaviour..... not then and not now..... I'ed shoot'em ! lol
but I learned just because they have a bike don't make them good people ! ( that took a while to sink in though) HAHAHAH
Bob.......
 

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