Good Advice from Back in the Day.

Downeaster

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Variation to the SunScreen song by Lews Therman.

Custom modifications by Team Obnoxious, 5/11/99

Ladies and Gentlemen .....wear Leather.

f I could offer you only one tip for improving your life, leather would be it.

The long term benefits of leather have been proved by serious bikers over many highways and many years, whereas wearing something unreliable like shorts and flipflops means you will experience a trip to the emergency room. There, uncaring nurses will scrub gravel out of your wounds, and doctors will dispense ineffective painkillers and meaningless advice...like telling you to trade that "murdercycle" in for a Camry.

Bullshit. I will dispense some real advice right now:

Enjoy the power and beauty of your ride; If you don't already; you can fully enjoy it by doing block-long smokey burnouts in the parking lot at the local drive-in.

Trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at the photos of you and your pals on your bikes and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much fun you had and how fabulous you really looked hauling ass down the highway dressed in leather.

Leather is as sexy as you imagine.

Don't worry about what your Mom thinks; or worry, but know that worrying about what other people think is as effective as trying to scratch your nose in a blinding hailstorm at 80 m.p.h. with a full- face helmet and
winter gloves on. The real troubles in your life are apt to be Volvo station wagons, driven by some dipstick talking into his cell phone or doing her makeup; the kind that blindside you at 4 PM on some urban roadway and then claim you crashed into THEM.

Do one thing everyday that scares other drivers... Lanesplit.

Sing into your helmet. Use mouthwash first.

Don't be reckless with other people's bikes, especially if you don't have insurance. Don't put up with people who mess with yours.... in fact, beat them with a chain.

Ride Fast.

Don't waste your money on chrome, or fancy paintjobs; spend it on racing or partying. Sometimes you're fast, sometimes you're slow. Sometimes you're hungover. The ride is long, and in the end, a cold beer tastes pretty damn good.

Remember the good rides you've had, forget the cuts and bruises; try to wear out the sides of your tires before the middle.... if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your oil changed, throw away old traffic citations.

Take chances.

Don't feel guilty if you ride faster than the posted limit ...the most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 how to ride conservatively, all the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of saddle time.

Be kind to your passengers, you'll miss them if they fall off.

Maybe you'll crash, maybe you won't, maybe you'll have surgery, maybe you won't, maybe you'll ride a cruiser off a cliff doing 40, maybe you'll get a new motocrosser for your 75th birthday ...whatever you ride, don't congratulate yourself too much - your choices are 90% foreign,10% domestic, so are everyone else's.

Enjoy your bike, use it every way you can...don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it's the greatest instrument of pleasure you'll ever own, not counting porn sites and a fast modem.

Wrench... even if you have nowhere to do it but in your hotel room.

Read the owner's manual, even tho' you won't remember any of it.

Do not read American motorcycle magazines, they will only make you wish you'd bought a British one instead.

Get to know your brake pads, you never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your tires; they are your link to the pavement and the things most likely to save your butt from a nasty highside.

Understand that mechanics comes and mechanics go, but for a precious talented few you should pay them well and buy them sixpacks. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle because the older your bike gets, the more you'll need the mechanic who worked on it when it was young and still not paid off.

Ride in New York City once, but leave before you get killed; ride in Northern California whenever possible, but leave a plausible excuse when calling in sick for work.

Do lurid wheelies.

Accept certain inalienable truths: prices will rise, traffic will get worse, you too will get old, and when you do you'll fantasize that when you were young, gasoline was cheap, the highway patrol couldn't catch you, and Harley owners weren't all yuppies.

Respect your rev-limiter.

Don't expect anyone else to see your bike unless it has really loud pipes. Maybe your bike has a big gas tank, maybe a smaller one; but remember, either way you'll have to make bathroom stops.

Don't mess too much with your carburetors, or by the time your done, you'll be walking home.

Be careful whose advice you buy, and save your receipts. Don't take advice from those who supply it for free, especially if they own a Britbike.

Motorcycle restoration is a form of self-torture. Doing it is a way of pulling the past from the dustbin, degreasing it, painting over the rusty parts and dumping way more money into it than it's worth.

But trust me on the leather...
 
Variation to the SunScreen song by Lews Therman.


experience a trip to the emergency room. There, uncaring nurses will scrub gravel out of your wounds, and doctors will dispense ineffective painkillers and

.
Leather wasn't an option riding to work in the military.... The uncaring nurses will scrub gravel out of your wounds everyday for two weeks, stiff plastic brushes, betadine solution and a plastic thermometer tip to chew on (bite the bullet).....
 
I once spent a very uncomfortable amount of time having 2 nurses cut my clothes off of me and scrubbing road rash. About an hour or so. That was after being x-rayed to make sure I had no broken bones. Then my Dr. got there to do the same to my face. I still remember looking up and seeing Dr. John say to me "you dumb son-of-a-bitch" I told you I would have to put you back together again some day if you kept riding murder cycles. 4 days later I got out of the hospital. He wrote me 2 prescriptions 1 for pain killers. The other said "Sell Motorcycle". I didn't listen!
My mom went to High School with Dr. John. He also delivered me. Was a very good GP. Wish there were still GP's around like him.
 
I once spent a very uncomfortable amount of time having 2 nurses cut my clothes off of me and scrubbing road rash. About an hour or so. That was after being x-rayed to make sure I had no broken bones. Then my Dr. got there to do the same to my face. I still remember looking up and seeing Dr. John say to me "you dumb son-of-a-bitch" I told you I would have to put you back together again some day if you kept riding murder cycles. 4 days later I got out of the hospital. He wrote me 2 prescriptions 1 for pain killers. The other said "Sell Motorcycle". I didn't listen!
My mom went to High School with Dr. John. He also delivered me. Was a very good GP. Wish there were still GP's around like him.
The first time I had a bone set(lower leg) after a dirt bike crash, Otto Stewart MD said similar. Lifelong friends of my parents. Mothers Day 1976. Mom thought I did it just to ruin her Mother's Day. First time also a hugely gouged helmet most certainly saved my life.
 
Thankfully, in over 50 years of riding, I've suffered nothing worse than some road rash and even that didn't require treatment beyond soap and water and a bandage to keep me from bleeding on my clothes.

I sincerely hope saying that out loud doesn't become a jinx...
 
Variation to the SunScreen song by Lews Therman.

Custom modifications by Team Obnoxious, 5/11/99

Ladies and Gentlemen .....wear Leather.

f I could offer you only one tip for improving your life, leather would be it.

The long term benefits of leather have been proved by serious bikers over many highways and many years, whereas wearing something unreliable like shorts and flipflops means you will experience a trip to the emergency room. There, uncaring nurses will scrub gravel out of your wounds, and doctors will dispense ineffective painkillers and meaningless advice...like telling you to trade that "murdercycle" in for a Camry.

Bullshit. I will dispense some real advice right now:

Enjoy the power and beauty of your ride; If you don't already; you can fully enjoy it by doing block-long smokey burnouts in the parking lot at the local drive-in.

Trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at the photos of you and your pals on your bikes and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much fun you had and how fabulous you really looked hauling ass down the highway dressed in leather.

Leather is as sexy as you imagine.

Don't worry about what your Mom thinks; or worry, but know that worrying about what other people think is as effective as trying to scratch your nose in a blinding hailstorm at 80 m.p.h. with a full- face helmet and
winter gloves on. The real troubles in your life are apt to be Volvo station wagons, driven by some dipstick talking into his cell phone or doing her makeup; the kind that blindside you at 4 PM on some urban roadway and then claim you crashed into THEM.

Do one thing everyday that scares other drivers... Lanesplit.

Sing into your helmet. Use mouthwash first.

Don't be reckless with other people's bikes, especially if you don't have insurance. Don't put up with people who mess with yours.... in fact, beat them with a chain.

Ride Fast.

Don't waste your money on chrome, or fancy paintjobs; spend it on racing or partying. Sometimes you're fast, sometimes you're slow. Sometimes you're hungover. The ride is long, and in the end, a cold beer tastes pretty damn good.

Remember the good rides you've had, forget the cuts and bruises; try to wear out the sides of your tires before the middle.... if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your oil changed, throw away old traffic citations.

Take chances.

Don't feel guilty if you ride faster than the posted limit ...the most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 how to ride conservatively, all the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of saddle time.

Be kind to your passengers, you'll miss them if they fall off.

Maybe you'll crash, maybe you won't, maybe you'll have surgery, maybe you won't, maybe you'll ride a cruiser off a cliff doing 40, maybe you'll get a new motocrosser for your 75th birthday ...whatever you ride, don't congratulate yourself too much - your choices are 90% foreign,10% domestic, so are everyone else's.

Enjoy your bike, use it every way you can...don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it's the greatest instrument of pleasure you'll ever own, not counting porn sites and a fast modem.

Wrench... even if you have nowhere to do it but in your hotel room.

Read the owner's manual, even tho' you won't remember any of it.

Do not read American motorcycle magazines, they will only make you wish you'd bought a British one instead.

Get to know your brake pads, you never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your tires; they are your link to the pavement and the things most likely to save your butt from a nasty highside.

Understand that mechanics comes and mechanics go, but for a precious talented few you should pay them well and buy them sixpacks. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle because the older your bike gets, the more you'll need the mechanic who worked on it when it was young and still not paid off.

Ride in New York City once, but leave before you get killed; ride in Northern California whenever possible, but leave a plausible excuse when calling in sick for work.

Do lurid wheelies.

Accept certain inalienable truths: prices will rise, traffic will get worse, you too will get old, and when you do you'll fantasize that when you were young, gasoline was cheap, the highway patrol couldn't catch you, and Harley owners weren't all yuppies.

Respect your rev-limiter.

Don't expect anyone else to see your bike unless it has really loud pipes. Maybe your bike has a big gas tank, maybe a smaller one; but remember, either way you'll have to make bathroom stops.

Don't mess too much with your carburetors, or by the time your done, you'll be walking home.

Be careful whose advice you buy, and save your receipts. Don't take advice from those who supply it for free, especially if they own a Britbike.

Motorcycle restoration is a form of self-torture. Doing it is a way of pulling the past from the dustbin, degreasing it, painting over the rusty parts and dumping way more money into it than it's worth.

But trust me on the leather...

I agree with Downeaster.
Came off my VTR SP1 at around 40MPH; fairly low speed after hitting some loose spilled gravel on a bend.
Hit the road traveled 20yds then went through a farmers wooden fence.
Bike followed me and thankfully bounced over me.
Full Leathers all grazed up by road rash; helmet visor came off and shell knackered!
I walked away with nothing more than my pride bruised.

RIDERS WHO WEAR FLIP FLOPS AND SHORTS ARE RIDING TOWARDS ACCIDENT & EMERGENCY!
They waste the time of emergency services and the doctors who treat them.
They increase insurance costs for all of us; and give biking a bad rap.
Stupid BA$TARDS all of them.
 
Might not be the right forum ,,There is an even better advice than Selling the MC after the crash the one
During
The Brit bike years .." If you cant afford a New Motorcycle Dont buy any Motorcycle at all "
 
Well two out of the three times I got hurt riding a motorcycle were in my driveway.

First time was while pulling in driveway on a Friday after work I got Tee-boned by a guy in an Isuzu Trouper who swerved to miss the car that was behind me on the road. He went across my front yard and missed the mail box then hit me. Six months out of work for shoulder injury. At least that gave me time to repair the mounts for the sidecar on the XS650 "ride to work outfit"!

Second time was again while on another XS650. That time I had just assembled the 1982 somewhat ratty XS650. Rode down the driveway and pulled a U-turn and accelerated up the drive, touched the brakes and the ancient rock hard tires and the near freezing asphalt put me down hard on the right side. That resulted in a broken front tooth and some skinned knees plus a hole in the engine side cover!

So I guess the morale is don't ride an XS650 in my driveway!
 
Good list Downeaster!

I'd add my own tip > beware of bird strikes and swine and deer. Doing a ton on backroad? Thinks about boars, birds, and deer... Summer noon-times are inho the less dangerous times...pick a road that doesn't have cover nested up to the pavement..

Ride 36 west...

In twisties hitting a patch of spilled gaso - weeeee!

In the ER I too have heard nurses and docs recite the ritual and essentially silly mantras about bikes and beanies and guns and stuff.

It was especially amusing to hear this stuff from people working on my knee (the wires and gears and the bones were really pretty!).

"Oh!" the chatter went..."were you wearing a helmet?"

Me> "I wish it had been on the knee."

Best!
 
PI.jpg


That's me with "F14" over my head. 20 years old, 6 feet tall and bulletproof. Got a LOT of Stupid out of my system in that 18 month tour...
 
I'll take the 5th Friend. Actually it's never been a problem, much...once on my WL the effect materialized on the freeway from a party in Pasadena flat out, tongues of pretty flame an all, to Eagle Rock and a favorite watering' hole for a additional few pain expellers. Alas, when I stopped I forgot to put my feet down, the scoot fell over to the right, and about 20 guys were laughing at my situation! 1976... We had very fine bar hopping in those good times. They help me get right side up, and bought me coffee. Ascot was still open.
 
I'll take the 5th Friend. Actually it's never been a problem, much...once on my WL the effect materialized on the freeway from a party in Pasadena flat out, tongues of pretty flame an all, to Eagle Rock and a favorite watering' hole for a additional few pain expellers. Alas, when I stopped I forgot to put my feet down, the scoot fell over to the right, and about 20 guys were laughing at my situation! 1976... We had very fine bar hopping in those good times. They help me get right side up, and bought me coffee. Ascot was still open.
1681252259966.png
 
Look both ways at every intersection at least twice even if you have the right of way.
I had a bike to ride on the road a year and a half before I got a car. The time on a bike served me well to become a defensive driver.
 
View attachment 240358

That's me with "F14" over my head. 20 years old, 6 feet tall and bulletproof. Got a LOT of Stupid out of my system in that 18 month tour...
From the looks of the female type peoples in the pic you got a lot of something else out of your system.
 
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