My Son

[jd750ace]

Buddy of mine about his infant son: 'How the hell can he drink 6 ounces of brown formula and turn it into 3 pounds of green shit?'

My son's second birthday: Thomas the Tank Engine cake. Blue. The kid eats icing all afternoon Saturday.
Next day, we are at the in-laws watching football, and he grabs the wall and starts pushing (you guys know the position!)

My wife says "I'll get it." Love that woman, I had just cracked the top on a Shiner Bock anyway! So, she opens the diaper, eyes bug out like this And she slaps the diaper back down, with a very confused look, tells me in a whisper, "IT'S GREEN"
I said, "Baby, he shits green all the time" Then she rolls it back and shows me this load of ASTROTURF GREEN SHIT!!!!


IF YOU HAVE BLUE ICING, AND A BABY WITH A SWEET TOOTH, DON'T PANIC!!1

 

[Johnt3]

Yeah, Green poop!! Been there do that. Good lord that brings back memories.

 

[sherwin]

I'm a NICU nurse, the other day I was changing a diaper on a little premie and he let out a burst of gas that made me jump. It was so loud and unexpected it scared the hell out of me, some other nurses saw my reaction and just laughed.

 

[1974jh5]

Oh yeah, my kid cut loose with some window rattlers!